The Blue Slipper Selection

KILL BILL VOL. 2

Here's the link if you want to find out more about the movie.

Went to see "Kill Bill" last night. A little overly sentimental in parts but good fun generally. If you liked the first one then for sure you need to see the second one.

The question that many of you have been asking is, "When are you jammy sods going to stop rearranging your furniture and get a job?" In response to popular demand I will now address the employment issue.

Jim is in the process of getting the police clearance necessary to register with the Department of education and training. When the paperwork is completed he will be eligible to do some cover work (as a substitute for absent teachers). In the meantime he is going for long bike rides and playing golf.

I had an appointment for tomorrow to hand in my CV at my old uni with a view to getting some cover work there when the next influx of students appears in June. I was therefore quite surprised to get a wake up call at 7.00 this morning saying that someone had just called in sick and was I available today. Er, well, Ok then. (Damn, I'd planned breakfast at the Blue Duck and a stroll down the seafront). I grabbed a random handful of EDTs ('ere do this worksheets) from the pile of junk I was going to get round to sorting soon and headed for the uni.

The class was a general English intermediate group of Koreans and Japanese plus a lone Swiss girl. They were lovely. I got back into it quite easily and by the end of the day the Director had a list of other days for me to work over the next few weeks. Anyway, gotta go. I'm teaching the top academic class tomorrow while their teacher is off so I'd better do some preparation.

Jim's out buying a bicycle so I took the opportunity to browse around Officeworks, drooling over the stationery etc. Yeah, I know I should get a life. I'm working on it, really I am. Yesterday was a public holiday for Anzac Day (war veterans etc) so today the shops (except Officeworks) are a frenzy of activity. People sure do love to shop. I spent the hol sitting in the garden sipping white wine with friends. Very pleasant.

Lacuna Inc.

And to get your memories erased click here (or head for the pub)

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)

Here's the link if you want to find out more.

YES! The bed was delivered ten minutes before the deadline and so I am happy to report a satisfactory conclusion to the business. I made the most of it at Baskin & Robbins with a hot chocolate brownie sundae with one scoop of chocolate fudge ice-cream and one scoop of homemade chocolate chip cookie ice-cream covered in hot fudge sauce. However, as the bed itself is so shabby it will have to be replaced within six months, I feel honour bound to buy Jim a Guinness anyway.

Went to an internet marketing conference at the Sheraton yesterday. No, I'm not likely to become a dot com millionaire, I was just there for the free lunch and to catch up with a friend who was attending. Fascinating to watch a master at work though. He asked a woman to stand up and look under her chair. She found ten dollar taped under it. The moral being that you have to get up off your arse to make a buck. A very slick performance and a lot of folk signed up.

On the way home a felllow passenger had obviously just bought a new mobile phone and spent the journey trying out all the different ring tones. Groan! It was just like a Brunei staff meeting.

We went to see Jim Carrey and Kate Winslett in Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind (or something similar). An unusual movie. Interesting. I'm not sure that I liked it though. After a failed relationship the main characters have all memories of each other erased. You come out wondering which memories you would choose to erase if you had the chance. There are certainly a few staff meetings that I would be better off without any recollection of.

Today we joined the local library and the nearby video store. Starting to feel like I live here, not just visiting. Friends who recently returned from overseas told us that they looked at 147 houses before finding one they wanted to rent. We just looked at this one and decided to take it. Are we lazy or just lucky? Probably a bit of both.

And has the bed arrived yet? No. He's given me a definite delivery date three times and failed to turn up on each occasion. I've told him he has till four o'clock today before he gets to meet my evil twin. I don't actually think he's trying to defraud me, he's just phenomenally incompetent.

So has the bed arrived? No. Did he phone on Monday as he said he would? No. I called him (all sweetness and light, honest) today. He said he'd been involved in 'a police matter' (!) which was why he hadn't called. He promised to deliver the mattress, headboard and castors this evening but claims to be 'disappointed' with the quality of the base so he may have to deliver another one later in the week. My ice-cream is in the balance here. Jim says 'mattress, headboard and castors do not a bed make.'

I know you are all dying to find out if the bed was delivered and I won my bet. Well, er, not yet. But I haven't given up on him yet. In fact I'd better get off line. He may be trying to phone me even now to arrange delivery.

Listening to: Random MP3s, mostly old rock favourites
Occupation: answering questions for the survey team visiting the district (90 pages!)
Reading: ‘Disordered Minds’ by Minette Walters
Watching: our holiday snaps
Ice-cream: soon, soon, (see below)
Quote of the Day: “Once upon a time, rock music was sung by the young to disgust the old. Now, it seems, it is sung by the old to embarrass the young.” Craig Brown, Sunday Times, 1993.

The TV finally arrived. The poor salesman got so fed up with our nagging that he put it in the van and drove down himself to deliver it. We have put the small TV and el-cheapo video in the bedroom so I can watch Dr Who in peace and the large (68cm) flat screen TV is installed in the living room so Jim can watch sporting events as if he were at the stadium.

The larger TV is connected to a combined video and DVD player which has impressed me no end by being able to play not only MP3s but j.pegs. I can see at this point half of you are nodding your heads sagely and saying, ‘How useful.’ and the other half are saying ‘ Three members of parliament and a bucket of clothes pegs? What is she raving about?’ For the latter group let me explain it means I can play music downloaded (legally, of course) from the internet and better yet I can view the pictures I take with the digital camera on the television as a slide show.

Future guests take warning. I have hundreds of pictures taken on our trip around Oz and I would just love to bore YOU… yes, you… at the first opportunity. OK, I promise to do some serious editing first. If anyone has a similar system and would like a copy of the disk so you can tell me you’ve already seen it at home then let me know via email and I’ll put one in the post for you.

On the subject of post, I found that our first telephone bill was stolen from our mailbox with the contents insurance letter last week. I can see how this could be excellent in the short term but will definitely result in problems with local providers of goods and services in the long term. The Post Office have offered to photocopy all my mail if I like but let’s hope it doesn’t come to that.

I believe I mentioned that Jim was getting seriously ‘shopped out’ so you won’t be surprised to learn that he jumped at an advert in the local community rag offering to deliver a bed to our door at a very reasonable price. The guy I phoned is definitely Perth’s answer to Arthur Daley, a real wheeler-dealer type. He turned up at the door asking for $60 deposit and promised to deliver the bed on Monday. Jim and I have a bet on. I reckon he’ll bring the bed, Jim reckons we’ll never see the bed or our sixty bucks. (I told you he was getting cynical in his old age)

If the guy turns up with the bed (or a refund of the deposit) by Thursday then Jim has to take me out for two scoops of Baskin and Robbin’s finest. If not, then I have to take him to the Sail and Anchor for a Guinness. If anyone else wants to take the bet let me know.

Hooray! Ikea phoned to say my comfy chair has arrived. My arse will sure be happy to move off the packing cases.

Spent a very pleasant afternoon sitting in the garden chatting to friends (ZB, SB & DB) and listening to birdsong. The weather is perfect during the day but getting cooler in the evenings. I may have to bring forward the search for the ultimate electric blanket. We've bought a gas heater for the living room but Jim refuses to unpack it on the grounds that it will encourage the arrival of winter.

Starsky & Hutch

Follow the link to check out the movie site for Starsky and Hutch. C'mon, you know you want to..

Ice-cream: one scoop of resolution breaker and one scoop of homemade peanut cookie and choc chip. Yum!

Went to see the Starsky and Hutch movie. My excuse is that I was a fan when it first came out. Jim wasn't very keen to go but I'm sure even he smiled a few times. It was very silly but enjoyable. It wasn't taking itself too seriously and deserves credit for that at least.

Quotes of the day: Everything comes to him who hustles while he waits. Thomas Edison

There was a young lady of Twickenham
Whose shoes were too tight to walk quick in 'em
She came back from a walk
Looking whiter than chalk
And took 'em both off and was sick in 'em.
Oliver Herford

I read a magazine article yesterday that said when you go on holiday you could probably, at a push, make do with just four pairs of shoes. Hmm, I surveyed my footwear collection and found it somewhat lacking. In fact it consists of one pair of all-purpose sandals plus a pair of scruffy, pink slides (as they call slip-ons here) that I wore on the boat over from Temburong with the plan to ditch them at the airport but they were very comfy and so survived despite their wretched appearance. My old trainers literally fell apart on their first suburban outing last week and the weather is starting to get a little bit chilly for barefoot beyond the garden. I can't put it off any longer then, I have to go shoe shopping.

Now, I've watched "Sex and the City" and I know we women are supposed to have shoe closets to rival Imelda Marcos and like nothing better than an afternoon shopping for stillettos but believe me when I say that doesn't apply to me. Think instead of that lovely cartoon of the exasperated shoe salesman surrounded by discarded shoes saying to the customer, " Well, madam as none of the shoes in the shop seem to fit perhaps you should start trying on the boxes instead." That's me. I'd rather go to the dentist than shop for shoes.

Needless to say, Jim refused to accompany me but I trekked round the shops alone and eventually found a pair of sandals and a pair of shoes to fit. I also bought a box of plasters just in case of blisters.

Driving into Claremont by myself the other day I realized that I had just used the left indicator in this car for the first time ever. When we were travelling I only ever drove down long straight roads. Occasionally I would be required to flick the right indicator as I overtook a slow-moving ute (that's a utility vehicle for those of you who don't speak Aus) but I never had call to turn left. This city driving is sure different to outback or Temburong driving but with luck I'll get the hang of it before I do any serious damage.

We were woken up recently by a passing jogger. He had found a letter addressed to us torn open and discarded down the street so had taken the trouble to return it to us. Someone had taken it from our mailbox. opened it, discovered it was just a letter from the insurance company and then tossed it aside. Looks like we won't need to bother about getting bills at this address, passersby will just destroy them for us. I thought it was very considerate of the jogger to go to so much trouble but Jim said he probably did it himself and was just 'casing the joint' and checking if we had gone away for the Easter weekend. Ooh, he's getting SO cynical in his old age.

Just popped in to wish y'all a happy easter. Hope you get lots of chocs and a spiritual renewal. Still busy here sorting wheat from chaff and constructing flat pack furniture.

Where does the time go? I should have time on my hands with not working and all but the days just seem to disappear and I still have a pile of junk where my office should be.

We started the day with a stroll to the river then drove for the umpteenth time to Ikea to pick up the frame for the other footstool. Chair still unavailable. Sigh. Ate one of their mystery meat, very cheap hotdogs for lunch and then called in at the light shop to find out why the filament in our ultra-fancy, new lamp has only lasted for two days. Back home to construct today’s flatpack furniture. Jim was not amused to find that on page 14 of the 17 page instruction booklet he had put the first piece on the wrong way and had to dismantle the whole thing and start again. I just stood by with a sympathetic expression and an emergency supply of beer.

Best bit of the day: strolling along the seafront while everyone else was driving to work.

Bought some pans today so we can put the polony sandwich diet on hold at last. In the afternoon Jim stayed at home constructing yet more flat-packed furniture and I went shopping for some food. Decided that unambitious would be best so I came home with some rice and a couple of cans. All was well till Jim began to prepare the meal and I heard a cry from the kitchen, " Sh*t! We don't have a can opener!" I'll butter the bread then...

I painted two shelves today. That's a first. I also did some ironing. Not a first but sufficiently rare to still have novelty value.

While the paint was drying we went down to Fremantle on the train. We didn't drive because we expected to be having a drink at the pub at lunchtime. What we had failed to register was that the Dockers (local footy team) were playing and every pub was filled with noisily enthusiastic fans watching on the big screens. Needless to say, we came home thirsty.

Thirsty, but not empty-handed. We bought a spatula and a wooden spoon. Jim also had to buy a new wallet. The old one has had a hard time lately.

We sat in the garden, enjoying the new garden furniture and trying to make sense of the instruction booklet that came with the phone. It claims to do everything including the ironing if you can only find the right combination of buttons to press. So far all I've been able to make it do is play "Old MacDonald had a Farm" but I'll persevere a while longer.

Now, I'm sure that you are all fascinated by these tales of domestic bliss but it will have to stop shortly. I began this blog as a record of our epic journey around Oz to keep friends informed of our whereabouts and to assure family that I hadn't been murdered by a hitchhiker or abducted by aliens. So, I give you fair warning that I am winding down the Blue Slipper Selection at the end of the month. I've enjoyed it and I hope you have too. You still have a few weeks to find an alternative if you've become addicted to your daily dose. ;-)

So, as predicted, we went out for beer. And came back with a washing-up bowl, a paint brush, a bin, 4 garden chairs, a table and an umbrella. This has got to stop!

At least I managed to install my new printer and the phone is working now. We may even be able to test it is i ever get offline. I sent out my new address to all and sundry. If you didn't receive it then yours must have one of the many that bounced back. Email me and I'll try again.

If you are more interested in the novel, click here.

Lions Gate: Girl with a Pearl Earring

Here's the link for the film if you want to check it out.

Location: Mosman Park, WA

Listening to: Deep Forest on the stereo and birds chirping in the garden

Ice-cream: Cookies and Cream Commotion

A friend (ta K.) sent me this riddle today which I happily share with you. What is this song? Scroll down for the answer.

My hen laid a haddock,
one hand oiled a flea,
Glad farts and centurions
threw dogs in the sea
I could stew a hare here and
brandish Dan's flan,
Don's ruddy bog's blocked
up with sand.
Chorus:
Dad! Dad! Why don't you
oil Auntie Glad?
Can't whores appear in beer
bottle pies?
O butter the hens
as they fly!

So while you're pondering I'll witter on a little about my day. Another day of spend, spend, spend but surely the end is now in sight. It's not so much that we have everything we need but more that Jim is beginning to suffer from post-traumatic shopping disorder. He says he requires a few days of no purchasing to help him regain his equilibrium. I'm willing to bet he changes his mind when he realises we're out of beer.

By way of a break from tripping over piles of boxes we went to the cinema this afternoon. As I had just finished the book, I was keen to see Scarlett Johannson in 'Girl with a Pearl Earring.' It was lovely and I really enjoyed it. However, I don't know how much I was 'filling in the gaps' with what I had just read. It was certainly beautifully done and I felt like I had gone back in time and visited Holland in the 1600's for the afternoon.

How did you get on with the song? Try singing it to the tune of the Welsh National Anthem and all becomes clear. It's believed to have been written for William Hague (by his wife) when he became Welsh secretary so he could join in whenever the anthem was sung.

Location: Home Sweet Home, Mosman Park, WA

Listening to: Whichever CD comes out of the box first.

You'd think, wouldn't you, that buying lots of new stuff would be the delightful, life-affirming experience that the ads lead you to expect. However, I feel obliged to report that there is a downside. Apart from the obvious rapid depletion of your financial resources there is also the inevitable frustration when reality doesn't quite match your dreams. It's so irritating to take forever deciding exactly which one you want only to find that your choice is out of stock and you will have to wait for the re-order which will be arriving in "maybe a few weeks." (five items so far)

Everyone knows that waiting for deliveries takes years off your life. How do people cope who have a job to go to? Our bed arrived more or less on schedule yesterday and we were initially thrilled. Two youths, who looked decidedly stoned and surely not old enough to drive, lugged the bits into the bedroom, dumped them unceremoniously in a heap on the floor and disappeared without saying a word. Jim set to work constructing the wooden frame but it wasn't long before the air turned blue and he was gnashing his teeth. The stupid idiots had forgotten to leave the bag of nuts and bolts. I phoned the shop and had the sort of quiet word with the manager that will probably haunt him to his grave. We slept soundly on the mattress but he probably tossed and turned all night worrying that I might pay him a visit. The bits arrived this morning and all is now well.

Our TV, ordered locally, was sent from Melbourne at the beginning of the week but no one has seen it since. Oh well, a few days without the tele won't kill us.

We got a phone number this morning so our first task of the day was to buy a handset. We brought it home to give it the 24 hour charge it requires but found that there is just a hole where the socket should be and it will have to go back. I can access the internet without it though so I'm happy and the fridge is keeping the beer cool so Jim's laughing too. We went for a lovely stroll through the suburb to the river this morning. The weather was perfect and we felt as if we were home.